Grief Masks

October makes me think of Halloween, and Halloween makes me think of masks, and masks remind me that sometimes when we’re grieving, we wear masks without even realizing it. We may never stop to think about how other people perceive our appearances, our images and our behaviors. Over time, we may gradually drift into a pattern of “being” that is so familiar to us we never realize that others might be seeing us in a totally different way .

Our pain may have caused us to have an outwardly distorted appearance, even when inwardly we may actually feel we are reconciling to our losses. Some people appear to be continually anger and bitter, when in fact it is only a reflection of their sadness. Even though their inward hostilities have begun to soften and resolve, on the outside they have kept their protective masks of fierceness. In reality, they are starved for love and companionship, but they are afraid to let their true feelings show. What if they were ridiculed, violated or abandoned and therefore hurt anew?

On the other hand, there are those who have adopted a perpetually “sunny” countenance that covers an internal sorrow. Their hearts and minds and faith may be splintered, but they are determined that the people around them will never guess their secret. They may believe that showing sorrow is a weakness that will drive away the people they think they need JUPAS Interview.

It would appear that masks are psychological props that seem to protect us from something we fear. For some people, self disclosure is as repulsive as public nudity! It seems safer for mask-wearers to endure the lack of support and attention they so sorely need rather than to honestly reveal their innermost feelings.

I wonder what would happen if we all let down our guards and allowed our families, friends, neighbors and co-workers to discover our real pain. Would our revelations really make us any more weak or vulnerable? Would we really be at any more emotional risk? Could we be hurt any more than we’ve already been?

Naturally, if we take the chance of disclosing our true selves, revealing where we are weak or frightened or hurt, there is always the possibility that we might become prey for the predators. The vultures seem always to be circling. But there is also the chance that we will provide an opportunity for the intelligent, strong and compassionate of our peers to offer their support. Where there is evil, there is also good. Where there is pain, there is also healing. Nature teaches us that in life, there is balance Picoway Laser.

Precisely because we have suffered the ultimate wound-the death of one who was truly loved-perhaps eventually we can afford to take more risks. It’s a tough issue: Dare we risk the pain of being hurt again if we disclose? Or have we become strong enough and brave enough to take a chance on the rediscovery of love and the richness of new attachments? Is it true that what does not kill us makes us stronger?

Your Hidden Portal to Peace

Want more peace and joy in your life? Daily stress getting to you? With terrorism, layoffs and pollution, can you feel safe and happy? Yes, you can-by tapping into a little known, and less-used, doorway to internal security. This entry is not really hidden as much as misplaced. As a culture, we’ve lost the use of this innate inner compass.

We each have our own personal portal to peace. The treasure hunt begins with an inner feeling triggered by outside circumstances. It’s a timeless game of internal guidance by external clue. For millennia, ancient civilizations and native peoples have been playing this sport for fun and good fortune.

Don’t Shrug off that Weird Feeling!

Have you ever felt a rush of recognition wash over you? Do new people or places seem vaguely familiar? Do you ever get a sense that you’ve been in this exact situation before?

This strange feeling of connection with places and people is a clue, a flag, a signal. This sense of familiarity marks a gateway to a personal gold mine of clarity and strength.

“It’s Deja-vu All Over Again!”

Yogi Bera’s famous outburst reminds us of the repeating nature of this phenomenon. The French phrase “deja-vu” literally means “already seen” or “seen before.” How? When? Where? These questions invoke the intrigue that gets us to play the gambit of a lifetime-the voyage home.

If approached as such, this feeling of familiarity can be a fortuitous opening or opportunity. This sensibility can be a portal to your intuition and inner wisdom-which, in turn, can help you make the right moves in life to bring you home to yourself safe and sound!

How Does the Game Work?

Act on the sensation of familiarity as you flow through your day. Instead of brushing aside the hazy sense of foreknowledge, follow the lead of these glints of recognition. As in a treasure hunt, one clue leads to the next until you find the prize at the end-your internal center of clarity. Take my recent journey to China, for example.